Thursday, March 10, 2011

A cup for losing!

Raghav has this tremendous fear of failure, which we have been working on......he hates losing and is a perfectionist - won't even attempt something till he knows he can do it perfectly - to match the standards he has set for himself.

Often, when we go down to play, he uses his cycle as a race car - decides on how many laps there will be in the race, gets me to time him, has pit-stops when I have to take on the role of pit-stop crew, and so on. But because he hates losing, he does not like to race with anyone but himself.

After many months of racing and playing games with us at home, where we allow him to win, yesterday he told me: "amma, I lost the race." I was waiting for a melt down.....but that did not happen. Instead, he pretended to walk up somewhere and get something. I asked him quietly and gently as to what he was getting and he said - "amma, I lost the race. I am getting the cup for losing!"

What an idea! We give people or teams cups for being runners-up, but do we call that a cup for losing??

Well, maybe this means that he has come to terms with failure....because it has come from him, not from us. As a mother, I hope he has understood what it means to lose or I do hope he will learn that some day. That is one of the most important lessons to learn in life I think.....and to be okay with it.....For failure must be a springboard for future success...

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